Why do people put such effort into professions that they suck at? Do they really have such a poor grasp on their strengths and weaknesses that they don't even realize how much they suck?
Honestly, if you have no compassion or people skills, a career as a mental health professional is not only a really poor choice but also a potentially dangerous one. Maybe the draws of a career on mental health is because if you suck, you can always shrug off the complaints and attribute them to the fact that your patients are "crazy." I don't know, but I do know that there really are a lot of mental health professionals that are woefully ill-equipped to be in a field that requires at least some genuine concern for their patients.
But worse is when people who are completely dismissive become mental health professionals. This is when it crosses the line from just being bad to being downright dangerous. If you enjoy having your head up your ass so much, do us all a favor and become a proctologist. Otherwise get your damn head out of your ass and realize that the stakes are high here and while impressive clinical skills can get you by in other fields, mental health fields require more than that. Don't like it? Find another profession.
Can't they see how dangerous their apathy is? I don't see how they could miss it. And yet a lot of them really don't seem to get it - or they just honestly just don't care. When someone tells you they're struggling and that things have been worse, don't argue with them that they're wrong because your "notes" say so. I assure you they've learned more about their struggles by living them than you have in the fifteen minutes that you've been "sort of" listening to them. And all it does is make them feel even more defeated at a time when it feels like defeat is all they get.
People wonder why there are people who struggle through mental health issues without getting help. With the state of mental health care these days, trying to get help without someone to advocate for you is often about as effective trying to put out a fire with a water gun. Everyone is up in arms when a tragedy happens that could have been prevented with proper mental health care but few people are willing to put in the time, effort and energy to try to reform a very broken system because let's face it, campaigning for mental health reform isn't nearly as sexy as campaigning for other things like a cure for cancer. And I get that. But try explaining that to a teenager struggling with mental illness who sees no other way out but suicide because he's afraid he'll be emotionally crucified if anyone finds out. And before you go and say that wouldn't happen because, you know, everyone is so enlightened about mental illness, I'll say that I've been called fucked up, psychotic, accused of being overly dramatic - all because of the fact that I struggle with depression and anxiety. And that's all by adults. Let's not even talk about the things I heard from other kids growing up. I don't like to admit that I struggle with these things because people DO make judgments and it can be very damning to be open about it.
People wonder why there are people who struggle through mental health issues without getting help. With the state of mental health care these days, trying to get help without someone to advocate for you is often about as effective trying to put out a fire with a water gun. Everyone is up in arms when a tragedy happens that could have been prevented with proper mental health care but few people are willing to put in the time, effort and energy to try to reform a very broken system because let's face it, campaigning for mental health reform isn't nearly as sexy as campaigning for other things like a cure for cancer. And I get that. But try explaining that to a teenager struggling with mental illness who sees no other way out but suicide because he's afraid he'll be emotionally crucified if anyone finds out. And before you go and say that wouldn't happen because, you know, everyone is so enlightened about mental illness, I'll say that I've been called fucked up, psychotic, accused of being overly dramatic - all because of the fact that I struggle with depression and anxiety. And that's all by adults. Let's not even talk about the things I heard from other kids growing up. I don't like to admit that I struggle with these things because people DO make judgments and it can be very damning to be open about it.
I remember a while back, I was talking with my dad about my performance review at my job and I made some comment about not being interested in going into management, to which he replied, "That's because you have no ambition." What in the actual fuck? First off, what the hell kind of thing is that to say to your kid who graduated summa cum laude with a degree in computer science and has performed excellently in her job? But all that aside, you'd think that as a person in upper management he could appreciate the fact that I can recognize the fact that I'd suck in management, but apparently not so much. Apparently that makes me lazy and without much in the way of goals. If I had known that, I wouldn't have tried so hard in college. What's the use of having the knowledge if people are just going to assume you're a moron because you don't want to be in the spotlight? But this has always been a pet peeve of mine. People bitch about inept management all the time, but then when someone like me comes along who KNOWS she'd be an inept manager, all of a sudden that's seen as a character flaw. So if I do try to get into management because that's just what you do after you've been in the workforce a while, then I become someone who just sucks at what they do. If I keep doing what I'm good at, then I'm just a loser who has no ambition. It sucks when you just can't win.
So how about we encourage people to do things that they're good at and passionate about? How about we all stop trying to push our own ideals onto other people and let them carve out their own path? How about we give people a chance to actually enjoy what they do without people judging them for not accomplishing what society thinks they should accomplish? How about we acknowledge that happiness and fulfillment and ambition don't look the same for everyone? Because that'd be awesome.
So how about we encourage people to do things that they're good at and passionate about? How about we all stop trying to push our own ideals onto other people and let them carve out their own path? How about we give people a chance to actually enjoy what they do without people judging them for not accomplishing what society thinks they should accomplish? How about we acknowledge that happiness and fulfillment and ambition don't look the same for everyone? Because that'd be awesome.
::standing ovation and slow clap:: Brava! Stick to what you're good at! Sitting! On a serious note ... very well said and I applaud you for knowing where your limits are!
ReplyDelete