When I was first introduced to Facebook, it seemed like a fantastic idea. I mean, I'm one of the most socially awkward people on the planet - what's not to love about a site that allows me to keep in touch with people without having to directly and personally communicate with them? Well for starters, how about the fact that I don't have to directly and personally communicate with people?
Okay, I admit I often don't like interacting with people. It's not even really so much a dislike as it is just general lack of comfort and ease in dealing with them. In short, the very high probability of me making an ass out of myself makes personal and thoughtful communication scary as hell to me. But it's not like Facebook fills this void. I mean, dozens of shallow and uncultivated relationships aren't exactly a replacement for actual meaningful, deep connections with people. I think Facebook's use of the term "friend" has gotten some people confused. Just because someone is your Facebook friend doesn't mean they're actually your friend. Friendships aren't built on wishing someone a happy birthday once a year because Facebook reminded you that today's the day. Friendships are built on love and support. Friends are people that know your secrets and love you anyway. Friends are people that support you when you need it most - and they're the ones that KNOW when you need it most without you even having to say it. The fact that you tolerate someone's Facebook status updates and perhaps even know what they've had for breakfast, lunch and dinner doesn't make a friendship.
And people seem to use Facebook as some fucked up popularity contest or political platform. It's sad to me how we as a nation seem to subscribe more and more to the idea of quantity over quality. Because who doesn't want to share their Facebook updates with 847 of their closest "friends"? Or, you know, that guy she met once on the bus and the lady behind her in the line at the grocery store...and probably a fair number of people she's never actually met at all. I get that I'm a hermit and all, but how do people even know that many people? I guess I'm just the type to prefer to keep a small group of really close friends. You know, quality and all...because I keep some pretty kick ass company. I'd rather have a handful of close and meaningful connections than hundreds of shallow ones. I guess I'm strange that way.
Others use Facebook as a tool for improving they efficiency - you know, to increase the the number of people they can judge or provoke at one time. And I know some people that are really, really good at this. I mean, it might be impressive if it weren't so damn offensive. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs and opinions and Facebook can even be a pretty awesome avenue for sharing and educating. But some people insist on being about as inflammatory as humanly possible. Instead of sharing their beliefs in a thoughtful way, they "defend" their beliefs by judging and destroying others. No good comes from this - ever - and Facebook makes it entirely too easy to spread this kind of garbage like wildfire.
So does this mean I'm going to give up Facebook? Probably not. Facebook has been an avenue for me to foster really powerful connections and it's been a good way to keep in touch with family that I probably would not have kept in touch with otherwise. But what Facebook will never become for me is an attempt to hoard as many "friends" as possible. The only company I keep on Facebook is my family and people I actually communicate with. It's a pathetically small list - and it's perfect just the way it is.
No comments:
Post a Comment